Preparation is a large part of a trip. No one ever just decides they're going on a long journey, and hops on the first plane they see. Unless they're extremely compulsive and rich, or running from the law. Since I am not either of these, this trip was planned well in advance. However, in the clear happy light of a few months earlier, going on this trip seemed like a wonderful idea. Great idea, to leave the country for the first time, live with a family of people I barely know, and survive and go to school in another language. A language that I took for eight years, and so a few months ago felt very familiar. Now the year and a half gap since learning it has widened considerably, and I am no longer thinking that going is such a great idea.
This feeling I have just described is called getting "cold feet." It is a common ailment among brides and other people faced with such life altering decisions. Indeed, it is quite a common ailment in general, and no one could be very surprised, least of all me, that I am suffering from it. With one bag packed and another almost done, the threat of major room cleaning, and the fact that I have but one day left leaves me in a state of shock and disbelief. Am I really doing this? Am I really going? It is finally sinking in that I am actually going to do an exchange in Vienna.
It is not really a matter of being scared (although I am), but rather of a wonder that I am really going to go through with this. It's something that I have always wanted to do, but I never dreamed that it might actually happen. Now that it is, all I can hope is that I have fun, learn a lot, and don't get too exhausted or homesick. It is a new journey for me, and one that I hope to conquer as successfully as any storybook heroine.
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